That's the summary of a sensational rant by football administrator Kofi Manu in the continuing inquest into how the Ghanaian league champions were eliminated from the African Champions League.
Algerian side El Eulma beat Kotoko 2-1 in Kumasi on Sunday and the blame game since then has been frenzied.
"These players do not sleep. I tell you all the time, they don't sleep," the GFA Status Committee member alleges.
Despite the fact that Kotoko players are known to observe bedtime periods strictly, Blue Blue, as he is affectionately called hotly disputes that the players have enough rest.
"The fact that they are in bed does not mean they sleep," Blue Blue continued, before giving the titillating punchline.
"They spend their nights making calls, browsing the web and watching porno!"
This allegation cannot be made lightly, so Kofi Manu took it a step further.
"If you like, get a medical expert to assess them and you can get confirmation. These boys don't have enough sleep!"
Manu was speaking to Sikka FM in Kumasi.
Red anger
This is the latest take by a newsmaker on the reasons for the Kumasi-based side's third straight failure to enter the group stage of the Caf Champions League.
Fans, who trooped to the Baba Yara Stadium in a sell-out crowd, have been extremely vocal through the media. The familiar blame game that characterizes such exits have taken on a particularly vicious tone once more.
Team management, new coach David Duncan, players and even the Asantehene have taken a share of the scorned fans. On Monday, the club moved to calm nerves with a statement.
Remorse
"It is unacceptable and painful that, when the supporters showed so much interest, the team could not reciprocate that with victory and qualification to the next stage of the competition," a statement from the club said on Monday.
It goes on: "We deem it appropriate to console our disappointed supporters and Ghanaians. We let them down. Management will not make any excuses. We accept the painful defeat while looking for avenues to correct tthe wrongs in the team with the hope of writing a different script next time."
The club is now focusing on the First Capital Plus Premier League - which they can win for the fourth straight time - and the MTN FA Cup - which they can also retain.
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