Why you should think twice before you say “yes” to being a bridesmaid

Always a bridesmaid never a bride? This is the real reason you should hesitate before accepting the honour.

One of my friends is currently going through the ordeal of being a bridesmaid. I’m saying ordeal, because not only is her friend a total bridezilla, but it looks like being part of the bridal party might bankrupt her.

This is a list of things she has to do and pay for herself:
•    Accompany the bride to all dress fittings (2 hours x 10 times)

•    Go on various shopping trips in search of shoes and lingerie (+-15 hours)

•    Organise a bachelorette party

•    Buy decorations for said bachelorette party (R300)

•    Buy bachelorette gift (R250)

•    Organise a kitchen tea

•    Buy food for kitchen tea (R800)

•    Buy kitchen tea gift (R200)

•    Organise a spa day for the bride, bridesmaids, mother of the bride and mother of the groom

•    Pay for her own bridesmaid’s dress (R2000)

•    Pay for her hair to get done for the wedding (R500)

•    Pay for the makeup to get done for the wedding (R350)

•    Pay for the shoes the bride wants her to wear (R550)

•    Pay for the spa day – facial, mani, pedi (R1600)

•    Take 5 days leave before the wedding to get the venue ready

•    Pay for 5 days’ worth of accommodation (R6200)

•    Buy plane tickets to get to venue (R1300)

•    Buy wedding present (R400)

This comes to R14450. More thanR14k. To be part of a wedding? No thanks.

So how should brides and bridesmaids navigate the cost? Well, there are many ways to cut costs and keep weddings from becoming extravagant.

And if the bride is so particular on what she wants, she has to foot the cost for those items. At the very least, the bride should pay for her bridesmaids’ hair and makeup and allow bridesmaids to wear shoes of their own choosing.

The bridesmaids should also split the cost of the bachelorette and kitchen tea, and should get financial contributions from the guests.

And if the wedding is in a different city or town, the bridal couple must prepare themselves for the fact that not everyone will be able to attend. I want to know if you think it’s fair? And how would you go about telling a bride that she’s expecting too much?

Have you had a similar experience? How did you manage when you were a bridesmaid, or a bride?